A Second Chance at Love
by antinomian
Summary: Requested by dragonspirit. After the fallout with Zoë, Grace finds her interests drifting toward Maya. Is Maya capable of returning her feelings? This is somewhat AU, but I hope you all can enjoy the ride anyway.
1. No more hiding

A/N: This story is a request from dragonspirit. The request was a story about Grace and Maya that leads up to a sex scene. Even though it diverges from canon, I'm trying to keep it believable and appropriate for the current season. I hope you enjoy!

She felt like a monster. Grace Cardinal was not typically a liar, but in the depths of her heart, something was wrong.

Technically, she was honest with Zoë. Grace wasn't gay, and she _had_ felt things for Zig, at least in the past. Now, though, her feelings for her muscular, sexy, albeit clueless friend were fading, and a new crush was taking their place. Lately, a certain curly-haired blonde was all she could think about. Against everything she had told Zoë about not liking girls, Grace couldn't get her mind off of Maya Matlin. In short, it seemed that Grace liked girls. She just didn't want Zoë.

Grace sighed as she sat down on her bed, trying desperately to focus on Algebra. If Zoë knew that Grace's rejection was personal and not just about being straight, it would crush her. Grace knew she shouldn't care how Zoë felt, especially after what the vindictive ex-cheerleader had done to hurt her. Still, Grace cared about her former best friend and hated the thought of hurting her with a line like "Sorry; it actually turns out you were right about me. I'm very into girls; I'm just not into you. Good luck finding someone who is."

Looking back down at her math textbook, all the numbers seemed to blur together. Grace couldn't force herself to care about the quadratic equation or about matrices right now. The only thing on her mind was her current dilemma and how bizarre it made her feel.

Why Maya? Before Maya, the only person Grace had ever liked was Zig, and the difference between Zig and Maya was night and day. Zig was one of the strongest people Grace had ever met, and she admired him for that. At the same time, he was one of the most endearingly clueless people in her circle of friends. Maya was his opposite in that respect. She was sharp, intelligent, focused, and brilliant at music. When she played her guitar and sang her songs about feminism and acceptance and girl power, Grace felt her heart race. The girl was talented, and her singing gave Grace chills. Thinking it over more thoroughly, Grace realized that Maya had a lot more going for her than Zig did.

Still, why Maya and not Zoë? Why the presumably straight girl instead of the lesbian who was crazy about her. Zoë was a talented actress and singer, a badass person, more intelligent than she let on, and actually pretty attractive. Somehow, Zoë just didn't make Grace's heart race the way that Maya did.

Even if Maya somehow turned out to be bisexual, though, Grace wasn't sure that dating her would be okay. It would crush Zig, and Zig was one of Maya's best friends. It would also hurt Zoë, and against her better judgment, Grace eventually hoped to repair that friendship. Even knowing all this, Grace's heart wanted what it wanted. She knew she'd have to stop, but for now, she had to at least accept that how she felt might not change for a while.

Sighing with relief, she reminded herself that Maya was straight. There was no way the intense blonde girl would ever want her back. Even if she didn't, Grace knew she wanted a girl. After her awkward experience with Zoë, she craved a same-sex encounter that would help her to be sure if she liked girls or not.

She thought about choosing some random and having meaningless sex, but the idea just didn't appeal to her. The experience would be lacking the same thing her time with Zoë lacked, and it would teach her precisely nothing. Grace needed to be with someone she genuinely wanted, even if it _did_ hurt Zig and Zoë. Both of them had hurt her, and she had forgiven them. She could only hope that if she hurt them, they would forgive her too.

If that was what she wanted, Grace knew she needed to be upfront about her feelings and avoid making the same mistake that Zoë did with her. Grace couldn't simply steal a kiss from Maya, however much she wanted to. She had to find out how Maya felt about girls, much less about her. If Maya didn't respond favorably, then Grace had to accept that and try to move on.

Her plan went into motion the next day. Maya was alone in the music room, practicing a new song when Grace subtly entered, taking a seat to listen. The moment Maya saw Grace, she stopped playing. As talented as Maya was, she was always self-conscious when she was working on new songs. "Hey," Maya said nervously. "What's up? Do you need the room for something?"

"No," Grace admitted. "I came to see you. I uh…wanted to talk."

Maya nodded. "I'm sorry I've been neglecting the band lately. I _do_ still want to play with you and Jonah. I've just had the solo writing bug lately."

Grace smiled, happy to hear that Maya at least enjoyed her company. "I understand," Grace said. "This isn't about music. I actually wanted to talk about…well…I actually wanted some girl talk."

Perking up, Maya offered a big smile. "Ooh, is there a boy?"

"Not exactly," Grace said nervously. "I did something kind of stupid, and now I'm confused."

"Grace Cardinal did something stupid," Maya said incredulously. "Do tell."

Grace realized that since she had never been in a relationship before, Maya probably thought that Grace was above making dumb mistakes with other people. "Have you ever thought about…being with a girl?"

"Well sure," Maya said casually. "I mean…everyone's _thought_ about it, right? The difference between my love for my best friend, Tori, and my love for Zig was mostly the kissing. We used to be inseparable, and sometimes I wondered if I'd date her if I was a boy…or a lesbian. Of course, Tori was straight as an arrow, so I kinda figured it was just a best friend thing between us."

"I had a friend like that," Grace said, "only there _was_ kissing. We slept together, and it was awful. Awkward. I just…I didn't feel like myself when I was doing it. I mostly did it for her because I didn't want to lose her."

Maya frowned. "You shouldn't do that. I used to date a boy who would kiss me just because he felt like he had to. It ended so, so badly."

"Cam?" Grace asked. She hadn't met the boy, but she had heard his name mentioned around school.

Maya nodded. "Trying to be someone you're not isn't just unpleasant. It can…it can actually kill you. I don't want to lose anyone else that way."

"I know," Grace said with a sigh. "For what it's worth, I promise you that you won't lose me, okay?"

"Okay," Maya said warmly.

"What I mean is," Grace paused. "At first when I looked back on that awkward encounter, I thought I had a bad time because I didn't like girls. Really, it was bad because I didn't like _her_. Not that way, at least."

Putting two and two together, Maya gasped. "It was Zoë, wasn't it?"

Grace drew in a breath, feeling both embarrassed and sorry for Zoë's sake. "Was it that obvious?"

Maya nodded. "I remember you two used to be almost as inseparable as me and Zig, and now you don't even talk."

The fact was painful for Grace, who missed Zoë's friendship, but she didn't want to let that sadness affect her chances with Maya. She did her best to keep her game face on and continue the conversation. "You said you liked a girl before," Grace said. "Do you think you'd ever…kiss a girl?"

"Well," Maya said, with strong uncertainty. "I guess I could try."

Without another word, Grace leaned in to kiss her friend. The way Maya kissed back was nervous at first, but it grew more passionate as Maya gained confidence. When they finally pulled away, Maya was smiling. The smile gave Grace hope that something good would come from the kiss.

"Wow," Maya said. "This is the first time I've kissed anyone since Zig. It was…weird."

Grace felt her heart sink. "Weird? Bad weird?"

"Definitely not bad weird," Maya said. "Maybe I'll know for sure if we do it again."

The two girls kissed a second time, and there was a definite spark between them. For Grace, kissing Maya was nothing like the stolen kisses with Zoë. It was passionate. It was intense. Grace loved it and wanted more. She hoped Maya would want more too.

"I…" Maya paused. "I think I liked it. Is that weird?"

"Not any weirder than me," Grace said.

"I just never really thought about it," Maya admitted. "I never thought I'd actually go through with it. Then again, I sort of thought Zig and I would be together forever."

Grace nodded with understanding. "I know how you feel," she said. "I've liked you ever since I met you in the Rubber Room and called you 'Princess,'" she said. "Problem was, I kind of figured it was just…y'know…envy."

"Envy?" Maya asked. "Of me?"

"Sure," Grace said, her confidence increasing with every moment. "I thought I was jealous of how pretty you are."

Maya blushed. "Wow. And here, I was jealous of you. Jealous of how confident you are. Jealous of how you don't care what other people think."

"The truth is, I do care," Grace said. "I care what you think. This will sound stupid, but is there any chance you like me?"

"I think so," Maya said with a smile. "The problem is…this is just really new to me. I'm gonna have to spend some time thinking about it, you know? Like…what it means."

"Take all the time you need," Grace said. "I'll be here."

The kiss happened on a Friday, which meant that Katie was home for the weekend when Maya returned from school. After Zig moved out, Katie had reclaimed her room and started visiting more often. It was a nice change, especially since the house felt empty without him.

"Hey, Maya," Katie called out from the kitchen where she was cooking up some fried rice for herself. "How was school?"

"Interesting," Maya said.

Katie turned to her sister with a smile. "Ooh. Did you meet another boy?"

"Not exactly," Maya said, setting her backpack down. "Would you think I was weird if…if instead of another boy, I kind of…"

"Kind of what?" Katie asked.

"I kind of kissed a girl," Maya finally admitted.

"There's no such thing as kind of kissing," Katie said. "You either kissed her or you didn't."

Maya nodded and took a seat on one of the bar stools. "I definitely kissed her."

"Well, I'll admit that I'm pretty surprised," Katie said, "but I wouldn't think you were _weird_ exactly. I mean…I briefly hung out with Fiona Coyne in high school, and she was an out lesbian. It never bothered me or anything."

Maya nodded, remembering the curly haired girl who was in love with her old bandmate, Imogen. "Oh yeah," she said. "I remember her."

"She had tons of friends, and she was super happy," Katie said. "I'm sure if you decide you're gonna date a girl, you will too. Will you at least tell me who she is?"

"Grace," Maya said with a faint smile.

"Grace?" Katie asked. "That gothed out girl with the piercings?"

"Like you're one to judge," Maya said. "Remember that blunt 'boys stay away' haircut you had in high school?"

Katie laughed. Her hair was now dyed a soft auburn color, and she looked much more approachable. "I guess you have a point," she said. "So…are you gonna go on a date?"

Maya thought carefully about the question. "I don't know. I mean, one kiss doesn't mean we're right for each other."

"Of course not," Katie said, "but if you don't even try, then how are you ever going to know?"

It was a good point, although it wasn't quite one that Maya was ready for. "You know what? You're right. Do you think that…if I ask her not to tell anyone just yet, she'll be okay with it?"

"If she respects you, then she'll respect your choices," Katie said.

Maya knew her sister had a point. She would have to talk to Grace about how she felt and simply hope for the best.

A/N: To be continued. The requester wanted a sex scene, but I think it may take just a little time to get us from Maya exploring bisexuality to them having a sexual experience.


	2. No more lies

A/N: I'm still not at the sex scene. I just don't want to completely rush two unsure, questioning girls into bed. I want to cover how they're going to deal with their relationship in light of the fact that it will probably hurt at least two of their mutual friends. After this, we can get a little deeper into their relationship. Also, sorry this chapter is kind of short. I just wanted to get something down, so I wouldn't forget about the story.

Maya walked into school feeling a bit more clear-headed than she had the day before, when Grace kissed her. Katie was right; even if Maya wasn't completely sure she liked girls, she was never going to know one way or another until she gave Grace a real chance. When she saw her gothed out, pierced, awesome friend standing by her locker, Maya wanted to rush in for a kiss. After all that she had learned about consent, however, Maya knew better than to steal.

"May I kiss you?" she asked.

Grace smiled. "I thought you'd never ask."

Luckily for them, no one they worried would be upset by their relationship was around. "Are we keeping this a secret, or are we completely open?" Maya asked.

"Secrets are messy," Grace said. "Let's just be honest with everyone."

"Okay," Maya giggled. "We'll make Degrassi history that way."

It was true that most Degrassi students never chose honesty as their _first_ course of action when dealing with affairs of the heart. Because of this general trend, Maya and Grace had dealt with more than enough lies in their two and a half years at Degrassi. Both of them wanted to rip off the band-aide with Zig, Zoë, and anyone else who might have a problem with their budding relationship.

"I think you should talk to Zig," Grace said. "I'll talk to Zoë."

In third period English class, Grace felt her heart pound as Zoë took a seat a couple rows in front of Grace. Before anything could be said, Esme took a seat next to Zoë. By the way they were laughing and lightly flirting together, Grace wondered if Zoë had moved on. It would be a major relief if she had; that way, her actions would not hurt quite so much.

"Hey," Grace said to Zoë.

"Oh," Esme said with a smile. "It's the 'not gay' ex," she said, making air quotes. "Hope you're not jealous that I get to do this." She leaned in and kissed Zoë on the lips.

"Actually, no," Grace said, trying to ignore Esme's attempts to get on her nerves. "Zoë, I'm really sorry. You were right about me. I _am_ into girls."

"You just weren't into me," Zoë said in a hostile tone. "Thanks for sharing, but I could really care less now."

Grace nodded. "I just didn't want it to come as a shock to you if you saw me with Maya."

"Maya?" Zoë asked incredulously. "Maya Matlin? Are you serious?"

"Completely," Grace said.

"Wait until Zig hears about this," Esme said with a laugh. "That'll be some fun shit."

At lunch, Grace met up with Maya to find out how talking to Zig went. "He's upset," Maya said. "I kind of expected it because apparently on top of losing me, he also struck out with Esme recently."

"I noticed," Grace said. "She's with Zoë now, apparently."

"Wow," Maya said, looking surprised. "How did things go with Zoë?"

Grace shrugged. "She acted a little bitchy, but overall it seems like she'll be okay."

"So," Maya said. "Are we girlfriends then?"

"I think so," Grace responded. "I think we at least need to give it a try."


End file.
